My Journey

The will to live well must be at the forefront of all that moves within us. Living shouldn't be just us numbering our days on a calendar but loving exchanges each and everyday. I think hardship no matter the form is an opportunity for change. Each soul enters the world with a number of days, from conception in their mothers womb to our last breath, it has been appointed. How we live those days matters. Joy and sorrow shall find us, marriage and divorce will happen, births and deaths shall be and our response to those events shall make us the people we were meant to be,  if we are yielded to the one who set the stars in their place. We can fight against everything that moves or we can make peace with our life and the events that happen. Living life with no agenda, living a life of liberty that is the moment we become a better version of ourselves. Laying down our false sense of entitlement, to anyone or anything or even time, will help us accept all that comes our way as just part of the journey. When we lay down all our posturing and become yielded we become something beautiful. When we accept that living well includes hardship, we gain more than we could ever possibly lose. Today may find you suffering but you my friend have the upper hand because you get to choose your attitude and therefore how you get through this junction in a life well lived.

My Journey

My journey has been long and arduous. This journey of compromised health began years ago. Three years ago the battle I fought was harder in many ways.  I was having migraines that wrecked havoc on my humanity. I was so hormonal due to menopause that my mind was fragile and I was holding on to anything I could for dear life. During this time I prayed for relief but I felt more compromised than ever. The hardest battles are the ones that get into the mind and soul. I felt the battle was for everything I held dear and I know it was. The battle then is much like the campaign today ..... Letting go. Then I had to let go and find what I could that grounded me. I had to let go of ideas and preconceived notions about who I was as a woman, wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend and I had to find me again and take care of the girl I had lost over the course of my lifetime. Today I have found her and she is my friend again and we are okay with facing the world breastless  because we are so much more than Breast. Today I am of a strong mind and therefore wise enough to know I am more valuable than my body parts. My mind is my greatest asset but rest assured even when my mind was compromised there was a part of me that kept trying to right my course, my soul.  I shall feed my soul for when everything else is struggling the soul leads you and carries you to places that restore you from within. That soul hungers for fellowship with it's Creator and therein lies the place of true restoration. My soul hungers and thirsts for fellowship with God and it is that relationship that makes me right with the world, nothing else, just me and the God of my understanding!

My Journey

Joy is my companion as I journey threw this unexpected turn in life. Joy is not what I expected a Cancer diagnosis to give me but joy is manifesting itself in my life. Joy at the prospect of celebrating another Christmas with my family. Joy in each and every moment with people who stop and take time to give an encouragement to me and those who love me. I am lifted by love, lifted to a place I have not seen in a long time. Those I love wear a look of worry and concern I no longer can carry. No, today I must rise above all that tries to weigh me down and look up for my healing will come from above not below. My healing will be multidimensional, I shall not only be recovering my health but my mind as well as my spirit. I am forever changed, body, mind and soul. The byproduct of all that is taking place in my life has made me a more grounded human being. I shall hope to carry out of this experience Joy that flows direct from my heart to others. I shall walk with a new confidence that says I am able to overcome because I trust in the unseen hand of the living God for it is He who sustaines me and fills my heart with hope and joy. My words may be hard to understand but they are full of joy and great expectations for I now know life is precious in a way I never fully understood before. Joy is internal and flows outward like rivers of living water, it has the power to clear out the mind and the body of any unclean thing, so here I am and I have decided to swim in these waters as long as God will permit. Wonder who else I will meet in these abundant waters?

My journey

Everything changes and everything stays the same. Circumstances change with time, we age, our children grow up, our parents grow old and we are here in the midst of all this change trying to make sense of it all. Life gets so busy we stop laughing and loving and enjoying each other. I believe if illness has a good side it is the fact that we are forced to stop the madness of life and embrace those we love and be still, in the moment. I am going to make the most of my recovery, I am going to enjoy these moments of one on one with each person who crosses my threshold. I hope to keep pressing toward my healing while holding near and dear these special moments that present themselves to me. Fear has no place in my recovery, I will shout it down when it tries to rise up against all the beauty going on around me. I can say I am blessed for love abounds and where love abounds there is strength. Change is happening and I am being changed for the better, how about you?

My journey

The nights can be long and quiet and unforgiving, when one cannot sleep, thoughts hard to control. I have decided the most redeeming thing I can do is pray. I pray the prayer of thanksgiving for everyone I love and care about. I call on God for mercy and understanding. I pray for wisdom and peace. I ask for the courage to face another day and thank him for the rising of the sun. I pray all my experiences change me for the better. I pray nothing on earth compares to all that is heavenly except for the love of those around me. My prayers help me grow strong and free, free from ideas and agendas, free to love and be loved. I surrender this feeble life I have over to the God of my understanding and ask him to enlighten me to his ways, so I might not dishonor him and his love for me in any way. In the darkness of the night I can feel the love of God piercing the darkness but only after I have stilled my mind from the cares of life.  Prayer has purpose and it is powerful, prayer can move the mountains of despair within if we ask God to help us in our time of need. Prayer has changed me and I am better for having an  ongoing conversation with the God of creation. Nights can be long and full of wonder if we are yielded and full of hope.

My Journey

Cancer is a scary word, it can make a grown man cry and bring families to their knees. I wonder what it is that our bodies are trying to teach us? Is cancer just defective genetics or environmental disturbances or emotional traumas? Many are the questions and all too few the answers. I think cancer has its purpose in life just as any illness but I think what makes it so hedious is the stealth way it comes in and then the wreckage it leaves in its wake. I am processing the destruction cancer has done to my body and trying to remain detached and analytical but as soon as I can no longer hide behind these bandages, the ugly truth will look me right in the eye. I  am also trying to learn what cancer has to teach me about living life. I am thankful for the gift of self acceptance, I have always been secure in my own skin and that makes me think of others who can only see themselves as physical beings, their journey is so much harder than mine. Funny how many people this disease affects other than the one who carries it. We often see great emotional trauma in families and upheaval and again I can be thankful for all the love and support I personally have received. Yes, cancer is a hard diagnosis but if we allow ourselves to surrender to the process and pray for wisdom we can gain more than we lose.