Finding God is not for everyone

I found God as a 4 year old in a Sunday school class in Delmar Md. I loved him right away. He made me want to be a better person. God gave me an inner desire to love others. His love for me made me feel special. I have loved God all my life.
I do not understand God, his ways and his wisdom are more than my finite mind can comprehend but his mercy I get that! I have been so angry at God that I actually felt hate for him and I have doubted his existence as well. God is not just this father figure I exalt but he is a person with whom I share a very important part of my life. My inner conversations take place with him as my guide, so life without God to me would have no real meaning. I could not get by without the thought that something greater awaits me. Life without hope is what I would have and that just isn't going to happen, I need hope to make it through my darkest moments.
I can remember having a conversation with one of my dearest friends and she said she thought God was just a figment of peoples imagination and I responded ....so what if it is? What if I have lived my life believing in a God that doesn't exist, so what of it?  What if I only die to find my journey ends there, in the grave. Because I have believed I have lived a much better existence than most, I have lived with hope. Suppose I get what you say my imagination has created  ...then I win again. I have spent my life imagining a world where pain and suffering do not exist and love is the driving force in everyone. I have dreamed of a place where my creator tells me how all the suffering in the world had meaning and purpose and teaches me about mankind. I will trade everything I have in this world but give up my faith in a God who some say doesn't exist.......it will never happen! I know that there is a power greater than all of us and I am banking in that hope, that he believes in me too! So if a loving God is not for you then that is okay but know He believes in you regardless of all your doubts!